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We created a one-on-one coaching curriculum to untangle coercive control.

The five units with a Stronger After coach will help you make sense of your experience, find words, and learn skills that help you move forward. 

Unit 1:

Common challenges after leaving

Unit 2:

Coercive environments  

Unit 3:

Boundaries and identity

Unit 4:

Reducing anxiety, developing confidence

Unit 5:

Moving up and getting help


See a full description below.

This questionnaire will help you better understand your own experience and communicate to us what you need. It includes our privacy and confidentiality agreement.

After you have completed the intake form, one of our coaches will contact you within 2-4 business days to set up your first call or video conference.

Remember, this can be challenging. Don't forget to take a deep breath and take care of yourself.

Unit 1: Common challenges after leaving

  • Generalized confusion

  • Anxiety, dissociation, anger, and depression

  • Loss of community and friends, loneliness

  • Leaving people behind and mourning

  • Feelings of betrayal and loss

  • Blame and self-blame

  • Repressed emotions

  • Unwanted thoughts 

  • All-or-nothing, black-or-white good-vs-evil thinking

  • New social rules and adapting to world

  • Finding housing and work

  • Issues with relationships and intimacy


Unit 2: Coercive environments  

  • Recruitment, love- and info-bombing

  • Fear, isolation, and coercion as a tool to create dependency

  • Promises of “Exclusive Safety”, salvation, reward after death 

  • Denial of personal boundaries

  • Extreme daily demands and life rules

  • Threats (physical, psychological, spiritual punishment) for deviation

  • Defamation of outsiders and those who leave


Unit 3: Boundaries and identity

  • Why individuality and strong boundaries were discouraged

  • Not being allowed to say “no”- a gateway to all kinds of abuse

  • Anger and numbness as good indicators for when boundaries are crossed

  • Developing self-protection skills

  • Check out your convictions - What to keep?

  • Developing one’s own identity and goals

  • Finding one’s inner space and safety (again)


Unit 4: Reducing anxiety and developing confidence

  • The effects of adrenaline and heightened stress levels

  • Rejection and feelings of failure and building resilience

  • Mistakes as (helping) learning experiences (tools) and living with uncertainty

  • Developing confidence and standing up for yourself

  • Learning to trust your instincts and your own perception

  • Making decisions and taking responsibility


Unit 5: Moving up and getting help

  • How to find a therapist and reach out for help

  • Assessing who to trust, when to tell your story

  • Voicing your opinions at work and in relationships

  • Identifying and communicating your needs

  • Forgiving yourself, allowing moments of perceived weakness

  • Enjoying life without guilt, developing hobbies and being content

A bit more about the process:

As a participant you will get one-on-one education about coercion in groups or relationships and social psychology (the study of why we care so much about what others think)  - tailored to your experience. You are welcome to ask questions, request additional reading materials, or talk about your own experience. It is not therapy. We highly recommend therapy and often, after talking to one of our coaches, participants are better equipped with words to describe their experience and go on to find a therapist.

Our coaches will respect your privacy, your own thinking and your own journey. You should feel comfortable to ask questions and build on your own experience with the help of someone who has experienced coercion themselves and then became a specialist in this field. 

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