IT'S NOT LOVE
Intimate Partner Abusers engage in many controlling and psychologically coercive methods to instill fear and obedience in their partners. They have a sense of ownership over their partner and are afraid of losing their power over her or him.
“It is not okay for someone you like to treat you poorly and then pretend it didn’t happen, making you question your own grasp on reality. This dynamic is called gaslighting. It’s a common tactic of abusers to shift the focus of the blame from their bad behavior onto the person they are victimizing.”