We created a one-on-one coaching curriculum to untangle coercive control.

The five units with a Stronger After coach will help you make sense of your experience, find words, and learn skills that help you move forward. 

Unit 1:

Common challenges after leaving

Unit 2:

Coercive environments  

Unit 3:

Boundaries and identity

Unit 4:

Reducing anxiety, developing confidence

Unit 5:

Moving on and getting help

 

See a full description below.

This questionnaire will help you better understand your own experience and communicate to us what you need. It includes our privacy and confidentiality agreement.

After you have completed the intake form, one of our coaches will contact you within 2-4 business days to set up your first call or video conference.

Remember, this can be challenging. Don't forget to take a deep breath and take care of yourself. If you are having thoughts of harming yourself, please contact a confidential helpline in your country. Talk to someone who can help.

Unit 1: Common challenges after leaving

  • Generalized confusion

  • Anxiety, dissociation, anger, and depression

  • Loss of community and friends, loneliness

  • Leaving people behind and mourning

  • Feelings of betrayal and loss

  • Blame and self-blame

  • Repressed emotions

  • Unwanted thoughts 

  • All-or-nothing, black-or-white good-vs-evil thinking

  • New social rules and adapting to world

  • Finding housing and work

  • Issues with relationships and intimacy

 

Unit 2: Coercive environments  

  • Recruitment, love- and info-bombing

  • Fear, isolation, and coercion as a tool to create dependency

  • Promises of “Exclusive Safety”, salvation, reward after death 

  • Denial of personal boundaries

  • Extreme daily demands and life rules

  • Threats (physical, psychological, spiritual punishment) for deviation

  • Defamation of outsiders and those who leave

 

Unit 3: Boundaries and identity

  • Why individuality and strong boundaries were discouraged

  • Not being allowed to say “no”- a gateway to all kinds of abuse

  • Anger and numbness as good indicators for when boundaries are crossed

  • Developing self-protection skills

  • Check out your convictions - What to keep?

  • Developing one’s own identity and goals

  • Finding one’s inner space and safety (again)

Unit 4: Reducing anxiety and developing confidence

  • The effects of adrenaline and heightened stress levels

  • Rejection and feelings of failure and building resilience

  • Mistakes as (helping) learning experiences (tools) and living with uncertainty

  • Developing confidence and standing up for yourself

  • Learning to trust your instincts and your own perception

  • Making decisions and taking responsibility

 

Unit 5: Moving on and getting help

  • How to find a therapist and reach out for help

  • Assessing who to trust, when to tell your story

  • Voicing your opinions at work and in relationships

  • Identifying and communicating your needs

  • Forgiving yourself, allowing moments of perceived weakness

  • Enjoying life without guilt, developing hobbies and being content

Born or raised in a coercive environment

If you were born or raised in a coercive group or family, our coaches will spend extra time on this topic in a sixth unit or throughout the five units.

A bit more about the process:

As a participant in the free, 5-unit curriculum you will get one-on-one education about coercion in groups or relationships and principles of social psychology tailored to your experience. You are welcome to ask questions, request additional reading materials, or talk about your own experience. It is not therapy. We highly recommend therapy and often, after talking to one of our coaches, participants are better equipped with words to describe their experience to a therapist.

Our coaches will respect your privacy, thinking, and journey. You should feel comfortable to ask questions and build on your own experience with the help of someone who has experienced coercion themselves and become a specialist in this field.